Chapter 11: Trivial Matters

Captain's Log -
The days have been passing in quick succession for me.  Despite the excitement I feel at impending fatherhood and the adventure it will be for me, it has not made the days as slow and never-ending as I thought they would be.  Patty has lightened in spirit since moving in with me as well and I have caught her a few times playing light-heartedly.

Although she speaks so little about the impending birth, she seems happy.  She recently was discharged from work to enjoy some time off before having the baby.  Something that has given her a lot of free time on her hands.

Maybe too much time . . .

My birthday came and went, Patty and I celebrated quietly at home.  I left my twenties behind and welcomed being thirty, feeling like it was the proper stage in life to be a father.

Together, Patty and I ate the cake, talking of trivial things.  Weather and Barnacle Bay happenings other than our own were the safest topics.

It seems to me that we talk of anything but the impending baby.  Although I have never said it to her directly, I do believe that Patty fails to talk about her feelings about the baby because she doesn't really want it.  It is also why I feel that Patty has no care to know what gender the baby is.  Curiosity is eating me up to know what we're having, but Patty's adamant not to know.  So I gave in to her request to keep peace.
So most times, because all I want to talk about is the baby and all Patty doesn't want to talk about is the baby, we usually are in a stalemate as to what to talk about at all.
I wonder if it were Gertie sitting across from me if conversation would be as lacking.  It crosses my mind from time to time that Patty and I don't often have enough to say to each other, that maybe we let slip too many opportunities to say things we ought.

I worry about things between us after the baby comes.

~Tom Calico